Friday, March 16, 2007

Loud Talker on the Red Line #4

Uggh. This guy gave #3 a run for his money. Total drama geek fuckstain. And please. Check out his douchey chops. Here's what I now know about this guy (and his two friends who he got on the el with and his third actor friend who got on a little later)

They were of the drama geek garden variety douchebag. I feel comfortable making fun of them becuase I was a drama geek back in the day. So here goes:

1. He's the director or a play. He was talking with his stage manager and his music designer who he either really wanted to impress or really wanted to french kiss.

2. The last play he worked on was (insert obscure boring Tennessee Williams play) , which was such a positive expeerience.

3. He referred to some Korean horror movie as a "film" and not a "movie"- not knowing that calling a "movie" a "film" doesn't give it more artistic credibility.

4. They were on their way to the theatre, but had to continue to refer to it as the space. "It's really a great space", "I feel like I'm going to need some time getting used to the space" and "I hope Chloe will feel comfortable being vulnerable in the space"

5. His actor friend gets on at the Addison stop. The director greets him loudly. The actor is on his way to an industrial audition. He's supposed to play a cop, but didn't have time to go home and change into a cop uniform, so now he has the wrong headshots with him. Everyone empathizes with him.

6. Actor friend works at starbucks. Makes coffee joke that was over my head.

7. Director makes a plug to the actor to come to the fundraiser for the play by saying that it might be a good place for him to network.

It just went on and on and on. Finally they got off. I feel a tap on my shoulder, and it was this super cute woman, and she asked me what I was doing? And I said I was taking pictures of the loud talkers and I was going to post them on the internet. She laughed and agreed that they were all so obnoxious. She introduced herself to me, and I introduced myself. She askd the name of my blog. I told her. She said she couldn't wait to check it out.

So, just in case. Hi Sara! Nice to meet you. I was glad to share in the douchebaggery with you.


The Burton Report - Arizona Cardinals said...

Plz keep the douchebag picture posts coming!

Anonymous said...


I just read through a few of your posts. I really like your sense of humor.


1L Florida,

obsquatch said...

Alright, Grace, if that is your real name. I realize that you don't chose your victims, they chose you, but I think that once you heard "director," you went from innocent lawyer (did I really just say that?) into a venom spitting-douchebag stalking-blogging superwoman. He didn't stand a chance once you sniffed out his 'that not so fresh' feeling solution solution (that's a douche, right). And that is why you make the world a better place. Keep spittin' venom, freedom fighter! Maybe someday the world will figure out that we can just cudgel these people where they stand. As for you and I, we'll meet up at neutral ground and I'll kick your ass in pool again, that is if you ever stop spooning your new best friend.