Monday, November 26, 2007

Dear Asshole at the Red Line entrance this evening,


That's right. You're a complete asshole. What kind of person watches someone slip down a flight of stairs (yes, readers, Grace has no grace. Apparently Grace also refers to herself in the third person, but that's a separate issue) and instead of saying "oh my god are you ok?" shakes their head disapprovingly and says, "Why do you wear those?" referring to my shoes? I'll tell you what kind of person does that: A TOTAL FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!

Seriously. Who the fuck do you think you are? You are fucking lucky you didn't end up with the heel to "those" smashed into your spinal column.

I mean, it's not like I popped up all fine and dandy and brushed myself off. No. I was down for the count. There were tears. There may or may not have been a yelp followed by a moment of whimpering. You fucking stepped around a crying, hurt woman to make your snide little comment. I hope you feel good about yourself.

Fucking prick. Jerk. Jackass. I hope your dick falls off.

PS. You are ridiculously unattractive.

PPS. If anyone cares, I'm fine.

PPPS. It's not like I was wearing stripper shoes in the snow. It was clear and dry, and clearly the heel isn't insanely high. Right? Of course I'm right. Asshole.

18 comments:

Daisy Duke said...

Your shoes are adorable and perfectly appropriate for commuting & work.

I wish 10000 evil suns upon said person.

Dick. Wad.

It's Hot in Here and I'm Stupid said...

This is the first time I've chimed in here, but I had to say this. Dude. This city is chock full of rude, obnoxious, entitled butt-monkeys. I wish I could say that I'm surprised but I'm not. Something in the water supply maybe? Who knows. Anyway though, fuck him. Shoes are totally cute by the way.

Scott Rose said...

This is exactly the reason I left Chicago. I have never lived in a city filled with so many rude fucking assholes in all my life. Come back to Los Angeles, Grace, where the people are friendly and will care about you if you fall!

last call at the bar said...

I feel your pain and hope the bastard will get his jackass comeuppance very soon.

For a while I was averaging one bad fall a year rushing to work in SF, a couple of which involved people stepping over me while I'm on my ass and my the contents of my purse scattered. If anyone said something like that to me at that horrible moment, I might have whacked them in the knees (easy access). This was before law school and learning the elements of assault and battery, of course.

P.S. People walk in LA?

biff said...

I try to avoid the Dearborn / Division stop. Only assholes live there.

Anonymous said...

If he was going to walk around you, why didn't he just say NOTHING, rather than make his snide remark? But as we discussed last night, you have to consider the source. He's probably a shoe salesman at DSW, who has to smile from 9-5 (or 4 a.m. on Black Friday) while women complain about the shoes he's brought for them don't fit their fat feet. He's no doubt passive aggressive, and your fall was the first opportunity he had to take out his aggression on a defenseless human being, some one who couldn't report him to his manager.

Sorry he ruined your night. Thank goodness you're all right. It's not clear whether you tumbled down the stairs in the Loop, or while getting off the train at home, but either way, those stairs are STEEP, and made of brick. You could have done some serious damage to (in no particular order): (1) yourself; (2) your business suit; (3) your shoes; (4) your briefcase. Imagine spending a night at Swedish Covenant, on top of bruising your ankle, and being subject to his moronic comment.

I'm sorry that happened to you, Grace. I'm sorry I wasn't there when it happened. I would have helped you up, AND bought you a drink. :-)

Harmless Error said...

Your shoes are hot. And I'm glad you're ok.

Fannie said...

i'm not at all surprised. chicago commuters are extra rude.

the proper thing for him to do in the situation was to ask you if you were okay, help you up, and then laugh about it later to his buddies.

vieve said...

Grace we are happy you are okay. I'm sure that dude hasn't gotten laid in 200 years.

ps. Totally dig your shoes.

blonde.counsel said...

I love the shoes. And at least you didn't rip your pants/skirt in the process. (I hope).
Glad you are okay.

Anonymous said...

Skirt ... she had on a skirt yesterday, to go with those great looking shoes.

Jane Know said...

What a jerk. I hope I see him later in our STD clinic with a heavy case of anal warts or drippy dick.

five tomatoes said...

I fell down in the middle of a street in Minneapolis once and somebody in their car laughed at me. Asshole.

I love those shoes and they are perfectly work/commute appropriate.

Vittoria said...

Grace, I know this is totally rando but the moment I knew I made the right decision in moving back to New York (altho most of my friends were in Chicago) was when a train conductor saw me coming towards the 4 train at high speed and actually waited for me to get there. If that had been the Red Line, I would have been left in the exhaust with the bastard laughing his head off at my gasping for breath.

Bar Daze said...

What a jerk, glad you're okay. So exactly where can we find the shoes?

vcugirl said...

he's pissed you're hotter than him, even when you've fallen down stairs.

Anonymous said...

You seem like a mean and snide person with a major alcohol problem. Karma, bitch.

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