Monday, February 18, 2008

Shannon Carlson- You need a new job, Baby.

Another really bad commerical, thanks to U.S. Cellular.

"When I went off to college, it was really sad, because my dad was illiterate, and didn't know how to pay his bills. So I pawned him off on Shannon Carlson, who works for minimum wage at US Cellular to take care of his finances so I dont have to feel guilty about running off to keggers at the frat houses! Now, Shannon is saddled with the responsibilites of having a retard for a dad!"

1. The daughter is obviously a huge, selfish bitch.

2. Is U.S. Cellular trying to curb the number of job applications it receives? Because nothing says "try a waitressing gig" like "Here at U.S. Cellular, we expect our employees to handle the finances of middle aged illiterate white guys."

3. Just to be certain, if I am EVER in Shannon Carlson's line, and I'm late for the bar because she's reading Dick and Jane to to some illiterate dicksmack, shit's gonna get real ugly.

4. How frustrating do you think text messaging would be for that dude? I'd have a lot of fun with that if I worked for U.S. Cellular.

That's all.

Oh, and Daisy said my blog was excellent, and presented me with this:
Thanks, Daisy!
I present it to Fannie's Room. She's very smart, and she is an excellent writer, and if you aren't already reading her, you're seriously missing out.


Fannie said...

Thanks Grace :-)

Now am I supposed to give it to someone else?

Grace said...

You're welcome Fannie. Yes. Now give it to someone else who's blog you really like. Like Opine-Ed, Maybe? ;-)

Grace said...

And by the way, I know it's not "who's" it's "whose".

I only point out my error because since I judge, I assume everyone judges.

Rachel said...

now see? i definately detect some tucker in there. more "fuck" please!...wait...that may have come out wrong...or just right. lemmie think.

The Namby Pamby said...

i hate that fucking ad. That cell phone company. and that girl.

I love you for posting what i feel

lowly said...

so here's what i've always wondered... why the hell didn't the college-age daughter who is obviously literate teach her dad how to read? is she just that selfish or is pops missing the part of the brain that enables literacy?

i finally settled on shannon and daughter's plot to scam pops out of all his money.

lowly said...

wait a minute... is shannon carlson fron the ivory coast??

Rachel said...

grace, who is this "lowly?" i might like her.

Vittoria said...

As I rode past Sox 35th on the red line yesterday (I was in Chitown for the weekend, awesome!) I gave a nasty look to Comiskey for trying to maintain that US Cellular field crap. Then I read your post and was like oooo same wavelength.

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