OK. I sorta thought that maybe I'd grown past these sort of posts. That maybe my blog should be slightly more dignified or something like that. Ok. Actually that never crossed my mind. However, I did start to think the Loud Talker posts were a thing of the past. Like, maybe it was too mean.
Or maybe not.
Meet Kristine. I named her Kristine after a girl I went to high school with, who annoyed me almost as much.
Kristine is talking to Friend. Kristine is nursing a broken heart. Very loudly. On public transportation.
Kristine is very happy to have Friend. She thanks Friend for being her girlfriend, although she knows that sounds weird and "lesbianic" (lesbianic? Lesbionic? Les BIONIC? The Les bionic Woman? Sidekick to the Leftist Gender Warrior? This is how great action movie plot ideas are hatched, my friends...)
Kristine asks Friend if she's ever dated any musicians, or actors. She informs Friend that it's very very difficult.
She marvels at some other guy and his desire to be a stockbroker. Why couldn't Kristine's boyfriend want to be a stock broker, she whines.
Kristine is very glad she has her family. (at which point she gets teary, and I almost feel sorry for her, and try to stop listening.)
Kristine asked if Friend borrowed a book from her without asking. She thinks the author's name is Cooper.
Kristine told friend, "it's not what he did. It's what he didn't do. Does that make sense?" (at which point I pull out my camera phone and snap her picture.)
Kristine tells friend, "Oh, no! He would do THAT!" gigglegiggle-coupled-with-fake-coy-glance-around-the train-to-let everyone-know-she's-talking-about-sex-because-even-annoying-girls-can-get-oral-sometimes.
Kristine is having dinner with Amy and Michael tomorrow, and she KNOWS they'll have some insight.
Hopefully Amy and Michael will teach her to shut the fuck up on the Red Line.