Thursday, April 22, 2010

Pregnancy Fear #4367345

The problem with waiting for so long to write, is then there's so much to say, and it's hard to pick just one thing. Not to mention, according to the Artful Blogger, I've lost my edge. Whatever. He's sorta right.

ANYWAY, in less than 2 months, I'm having a baby. That's a pretty crazy reality. I'm totally not ready for it, but that doesn't really freak me out. I also have no idea how to handle a newborn. Sometimes that doesn't freak me out. Today it doesn't freak me out. Today I am too busy being freaked out by other things.

15 years ago this week, a dude by the name of Timothy McVeigh blew up the Federal Building in downtown Oklahoma City. He killed something like 160 people, which was, until 9/11/01, the largest act of domestic terrorism the US had ever seen. He was a real asshole.

11 years ago this week, two dudes, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, walked into Columbine High School, where they were both seniors, and shot a bunch of people, wounding 20 something people and killing 13. They complained that they were bullied and unpopular. So they killed people. Also, huge assholes.

As I annually like to point out, April is National Sexual Assault Awareness Month. A whole month dedicated to the awareness of sexual assault is necessary because the fact is, a lot of sexual assaults happen every year. And every last one of them? Committed by assholes.

April is also National Poetry Month. Who writes poetry? You guessed it. Assholes.

Naturally, now I turn the point of this post back to myself. Or, more specifically, my unborn son.

What if HE'S an asshole? I'm not kidding. My brother is an asshole. My sister is an asshole. I'm sort of an asshole, although charming in my own right. We're not criminals by any means, but it's not completely unfathomable to think there's a possibility that my son could be an asshole!

Now, before you all say, "Oh Grace, you'll teach him right from wrong! You'll look for the signs that he is building bombs in the bathroom! You'll teach him to respect women! You'll explain to him what writing sonnets will do to his soul! You will teach by example" Well, of course I will. I will do all those things a million times over, but we can't just assume that will be enough to guarantee our children won't be rapists, murderers or poets. I'm sure the Harris, Klebold and McVeigh families didn't condone violence. I'm sure that lots of mothers and fathers taught their sons the horrors of sexual assault, and the need to learn to respect women, only to visit their son in Statesville Correctional Facility for rape.

That's kinda terrifying. How the fuck do the rest of you deal with that? I really want to know.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Coming Back. No. For Real I am.

A good friend of mine inspired me (mainly by complimenting me a lot and comparing me to a very talented and funny famous writer) to write again. I do have a lot to say. LOTS of things to report.

For example, I moved.

And I hugged a stranger.

And got engaged. Not to the stranger I hugged.

More on all that later.

I'm also still pregnant.

I will be back tomorrow.

OH. And courtesy of Butterflyfish, another Stolen Lines coming Friday.