Monday, March 18, 2013

Really? 40?

Yep.  I'm 40.  Just happened the other day. 40. Years. Old. 

I sure don't feel 40.  For a lot of reasons. Here are some of them in no particular order. 

I don't feel 40 because I went to law school in my 30's, and a lot of my law school friends are on average 8 years or so younger than me. 

I don't feel 40 because because I just got married 2 years ago.  Wasn't I supposed to do that 10 years ago or so?

I don't feel 40 because I still go commando, like, most of the time. 

I don't feel 40 because I don't look 40. 

I don't feel 40 because all the moms around me at the toddler playgrounds are 30ish. 

I don't feel 40 because I DON'T HAVE MY SHIT TOGETHER AND 40 YEAR OLDS HAVE THEIR SHIT TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't feel 40 because I still like ramen noodles.  A lot. 

I don't feel 40 because I swear a lot. 

however...

i feel forty because my back hurts a lot sometimes for no good reason

i feel forty because i worry about dying

i feel forty because i can't day drink anymore

i feel forty because sometimes when i try on clothes i ask myself if it looks like i'm "trying too hard" to look twenty

i feel forty because the most expenisve product i have is anti-wrinkle cream

i feel forty because i don't know who the fuck anyone is in people magazine anymore

My husband asked what I wanted for my birthday this year.  I said a flash mob.  He said no.  He did throw me a very nice surprise party, though, took me to the theatre, and gave me a pretty blue box, containing pretty fancy jewelry. All in all a pretty spectacular weekend. 

I try to get past the whole number thing.  I really do.  And to everyone who says, "It's just a number", well that's true.  It is just a number, but it's a number with weight. 
And meaning.
And presumptions.
And back fat. 

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

So, this happens to every mom, right?

We all start believing our toddler's tv shows are sending us messages through the TV, right?  I, mean, right?


Hello Hello Hello?


Hello Blog!  It's nice to see you!  I can't believe it's been a year and a half!  I've actually been back to read you a lot lately.  I've gone over a lot of old things that I've written here, and I have to say, I was pretty fucking funny at times.  I choose to re-read those a lot more than the ones where I was boring and stupid. 

I really don't know how people keep up with writing when they have babies and jobs and stuff.  It really is a discipline, and, I of course am not disciplined at all.  But I do like writing.  And I miss it. 

I guess a small life update is in order.  My little guy G is doing really well.  Not gonna lie, he can be quite a dick.  He's 2 and a half, and he can be a boundary pushing asshat.  He walked up to me the other day and said "Sorry mommy I throw your phone in the potty."  He also loves to dump over cups with liquid in them.  But other than that, which I've been told is fairly normal, he's really amazing.  He loves trucks.  Like, a real real lot. 


Work is awesome, but very different than it was a couple of years ago.  Just recently I got promoted to a new assignment, and it's fascinating, and freaky, and dramatic, and sad, and thrilling.  The hours are crazy and long, and I regularly have to talk to people who are covered in blood.  Sometimes their blood, sometimes someone else's.  It makes me fucking NUTS that I can't write about it.  One of the benefits is every once in a while I have a couple of days off in the middle of the week, where G is at school, and Husband is at work, and I have the whole house to myself.  Like today.  I'd like to say I've used that time really productively, but that would be a huge lie.  Lots of coverage of the Jodi Arias trial, Dance Moms, and Law and Order marathons.  I also eat ramen noodles for breakfast a lot on days like today.  Don't know why.  Oh yeah I do.  Because they are delicious. 

But it did get me thinking about writing on this blog again.  We'll see how it goes.   I do have some stories to share...


For now, though, here's G: